Now I Go Forth...

I am a nursing student, and I also work full time. Normally this combination does not go together well. In my case, the only things that have helped me get through it is the combination of determination, my wonderful husband, my friends, and my family. Due to limited time and my need for sleep I don't get to see the most important people in my life, but since they are so understanding they forgive me for that. I know it must be hard on my husband...me not being the perfect wife who cooks dinner every night and cleans the house. I can understand that even though he is so supportive, he still must get so frustrated. He is unable to work due to he is disabled with a condition called Myasthenia Gravis, which leaves him weak and tired much of the time. I am working full time and going to nursing school so we can have a better life. It does put a lot of pressure on me. Sometimes I feel that I might have a nervous breakdown, but I try to fight it with sleep, anti-anxiety pills, and venting to my friends. This seems to work for me. Sometimes I wish that he could get a good job and help me out. Sometimes I even wish that I had married someone without the problems that he has. Those moments only last a little while until I see him smile at me, encourage me, or do something so sweet. We have been trying for children for the past couple of years. My doctor said that I may have to take medication to help me get pregnant. I hear my biological clock screaming at me, but with school and work now is not a great time. I only have 124 days of school left! This will make my third degree. I have a general AA and a BA in Criminal Justice. I could not use my BA because my husband has a criminal record. That was what prodded me to go back to school. I have a dead end job that does not pay enough for us to live on for very long. We have an old house, an old car, and medical bills. I need to make more money! Money sucks!